"In the end we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." -Martin Luther King, Jr.
Ever struggled with the silence of a friend or lover, or been a silent partner yourself?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
A forum for people to share stories about their personal experience with the phenomena of silence.
3 comments:
In answer to the question:
Yes.
And I'd rather not elaborate, despite the chosen anonymity of this entered text.
The generational gap between youth and older adults on attitudes towards sharing personal "stuff" on-line perhaps indicates which generation I align with. That is, my chosen silence on who I am, or how silence exists with loved-ones, reveals something of me.
So, at this point, I'll return to silence...
The subplot/theory of a popular show on television called "House" is that everyone lies. Always. And for many reasons. Lies are not a moment of desparation, but a process of being. Some issues are gender-based perhaps. Some are personal. I wonder what would happen if we all spoke what we always felt. I think it would be akin to putting our names and phone numbers on the side of our car.
In my experience, LONG TERM silence of a friend or lover has usually meant that they're harboring negative or judgemental feelings of some sort. I find it a particularly painful form of passive aggression that doesn't show much love or respect for the other person and reflects badly on the state of the relationship in those moments. While there's certainly an important and essential time for silence and private self reflection in all relationships, long term lack of communication (out of either fear or a need to control) is damaging in the worst possible way and usually does nothing to resolve the underlying negative feelings. In fact, they only deepen, fed by nothing but interior processing and self absorbtion.
Post a Comment